In my dog’s world, who’s training who?

By Tammy Malgesini

Staff Writer

Published on January 31, 2017 7:34PM

As time goes on, I’m learning to think more like a dog.

While watching “Dog with a Blog,” sometimes I wish the General could just tell me what he’s thinking. A 4-year-old German shepherd — he’s the smartest dog I’ve ever had. I’m sure he doesn’t think the same of me.

While I feel extremely safe and protected when I’m with him, it evidently took him awhile to feel the same with me. I know this because the first time we went on a trip without John and Lucifer, the General didn’t do a duty for nearly 40 hours.

No matter how much I wanted him to take care of business, it wasn’t happening. In addition to the multiple stops on the way to Klamath Falls, when I got to the hotel I took him outside numerous times.

Seriously, nothing. I found all kinds of great spots for him. Along the lines of you can take a horse to water — he was having none of it.

I later learned I was approaching it all wrong. I was thinking like a human — you know, turning my head and looking the other way to give him privacy.

Dogs feel most vulnerable when doing their business, so they look to their human for protection. Go ahead, Google it. I was supposed to stare at him — reassuring him that I had his back.

Now it totally makes sense the first time I brought him to work late one night. When I went to the restroom, he crawled underneath the stall door, sat down and gazed at me the entire time.

I’m like, “Dude, the door is locked, you can sit out there.” Of course, he was probably thinking I was being ungrateful.

There are things I still need to figure out. I don’t get why the General shakes his head and tries to get out of the way when I blow in his face. This is the same dog that can’t wait for me to roll down the window when I’m driving so he can stick his head out.

And, evidently the General was royalty in a previous life. When I’m getting treats in the kitchen, Lucifer comes running to get some. General, on the other hand, waits to have his delivered. I swear he has a look on his face like, “What took you so long?”

In his eyes, I may be the prehistoric canine goddess but there are still things I need to learn.

———

Tammy Malgesini is the community editor. Her column, Inside my Shoes, includes general musings about life. Contact her at tmalgesini@eastoregonian.com or 541-564-4539.

Inside my shoes goes inside my head

By Tammy Malgesini

Staff Writer

Published on January 11, 2017 10:31AM

Sometimes I think I think too much.

Simple things can get my head twisting and turning — like why aren’t birth control pills dispensed in childproof containers? Or what are the names of the two people in a “Pedestrian Crossing” sign?

But one thing that occupied a lot of space in my mind recently is the packaging of products.

Over the holidays, a box of Gudrun chocolates appeared in the newsroom’s kitchen. The thing that intrigued me was the intricate packaging.

It came in a lovely silver case (box is too simple for the elegant craftsmanship, which even featured a magnetic strip to hold the flap down). Inside were two glorious trays of candies.

A brochure included a three-paragraph description of the process of making chocolates — from choosing the right cocoa beans to the development of recipes. It ended with the simple word, “Enjoy!”

Back in the day, Candyce Lukens, a former boss, would push her fingernail into the bottom of a piece of candy to determine what was inside. Those techniques aren’t required with Gudrun.

The insert featured mouth-watering descriptions of each piece of candy — complete with a color photos.

Each morsel of deliciousness had its own name — including Twinkle (pistachio with hazelnut pieces) Seabreeze (a layered truffle with salted caramel) and Cocorico (milk chocolate with coconut ganache). I’m licking my lips as I type.

Speaking of coconut — I recall the time my good buddy Marko Briley mistakenly started to eat some “flakes” of paper. The error was understandable — he’s legally blind. But, the bigger contributing factor was the packaging.

This, also, was a box of chocolates. The pieces of candy were lying in a bed of what appeared to be gourmet coconut flakes. The paper actually looked like and had the consistency of coconut.

However, Marko said it didn’t taste like coconut. I took his word for it.

It certainly doesn’t make sense to package gourmet chocolates in a bed of paper.

Oh, and by the way, I named the people in the “Pedestrian Crossing” signs — Pedestri-ANN and Pedestri-ANDY. You’re welcome!

———

Tammy Malgesini is the community editor. Her column, Inside my Shoes, includes general musings about life. Contact her at tmalgesini@eastoregonian.com or 541-564-4539.